All in Fostered


some things have happened. Like he hit me once or twice but he apologized after that happened. He cried and said “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.” And now I’m having a child from him. I want a boy.


I grew up in a KKK family. I was made to drink beer at age six. I was made to smoke my first blunt at the age of eight. I’ve been abused with electric cattle prods, thrown into a stove, electrical cords… Most of the abuse was by my brother’s father. 


The system took me away from my mother when I was eight or nine. The abuse was going on all the time. When she smoked, she’d beat me. When she couldn’t get none, she’d beat me. I had cigarette burns. I had scars all over my body from extension cords. 


I would want him to know that even though it seems that I’m choosing the drugs over him, that it’s really not the case. *Balling* I don’t know… I just… I don’t know where to start to even get right. It’s not really stopping using the drugs that I need to deal with as much as why I use the drugs in the first place.


you ever heard of a whistler as a tool of punishment? I’d come home with a bad grade or if my grandma was just having a bad day… it was a piece of plywood that had holes drilled into it. My dad made it for her. 


After you come off that bed you would have to go into what they called a behavior control room, which was worse than a jail cell. There are concrete walls and a hole in the concrete floor. It is completely empty. They feed you through the door and you have to eat with your hands because you aren’t allowed any silverware.