All tagged depression


It’s a terrible place to be. It really is. I remember once, my son was six years old. He came home from school and put his arms around me. I remember forcing myself to hug this kid and show some love, and I didn’t want to love him. I didn’t want to hug him. My son was my joy, my gosh. 


I fight depression. I always have, and in the last few years, I learned that the less I care what anybody thinks, the happier I am. At the beginning of this year, I really, really embraced it, and it’s been the best four months of my life.


I feel like I was born sort of weak and small, you know. They told me that I'd probably never be independent. They had me on disability when I was a little kid and that's how my life was  setup.


I lost my son in 2010 in a car accident. I had a nervous breakdown. I had been in AA at that point for 15 years, sober. Before I lost my son I  had never thought about my mental health condition .


I never really painted up until five years ago when my wife left me. She was from the Philippines and I went over there and met her and got her. After 10 years of marriage she left me. I fell into a real bad depression, a real dangerous depression, where I wanted to die, kill myself, because I felt like my whole life was worthless. 


I was picked on all the time because I wasn’t Hispanic. I had the birth defect with my hand and I was a tiny kid. I became so prejudice against Hispanics because they were the one’s picking on me, making my life horrible. I just became so hateful.


Yeah I used to cut on my arms. I get explosive. When I get pissed off and mad. I be afraid about what I’m gonna do to somebody or somebody gonna do to me.